Lifes Journey Towards My Deathbed
by PuppyDogJou
Summary: Just something random I had sitting around, thought I'd turn it into a fanfiction. -- Jounouchi Katsuya reflex on his life with his friends, and what’s going to change in his near future.


Lime Rocker: I know it was rather pointless, and kinda weird, but it was something I had laying around and though, "Hay, why not put this up on FF!?" This started out as an English free write for some kind of "Journey" that we've taken through our live, or going to take… I donno, I was bored and wanted to write in Jounouchi's POV again…

It's also an apology for not having updated in awhile, going through a hard time. But I'm leaving tomorrow for some R and R. I'm hoping that helps whatever this mood is so I can get back into writing again! THANKS FOR READING GUYS!

Story: Life's Journey Toward the Deathbed

Pairing: None

Rating: K for Kid

Warnings: This is the result of extreme boredom and guilt for not having updated -- the story itself is rather odd....

Summary: Jounouchi Katsuya reflex on his life with his friends, and what's going to change in the near future.

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**Life's Journey Toward My Deathbed**

I frequently ask my friends if they think I'm turning out alright. Honda usually makes a crack about me turning out like him, only not as good looking – his words not mine. While Yuugi smiles up at me and assure me I'm a great person. Anzu usually says something about my procrastination, which I have to admit, is a problem. And Ryou just laughs and pats me on the back.

Lately, I find myself thinking a lot about my place in life; what will I do in the future, will I make the right choices, will I be alright on my own, away from my friends? I've lived alone for awhile now; I had to get away from that drunk of a father. Yet I've always had my friends, they've always been there for me, and I them. But now, we're all going our separate ways, going on with our lives.

Yuugi's going with his Grandpa to Egypt. I think he said something about meeting up with Isis and Malik to figure out away to reunited with this other self. I'm sure the guy wouldn't mind in the least. Plus I'll get twenty bucks from Anzu, we mad a bet a long time ago that the two were dating. It was so obvious before, I don't know why no one else noticed.

Speaking of Anzu, she's headed to London to work on her dancing. She's pretty good too. Ryou introduced her to some of his extended family, and they agreed to give her a room and food for help around their house. Apparently she's seeing some guy who plays "football" (that's what they call soccer) for some _shmansy_ British college. Ryou introduced them too. He's pretty cute, blonde hair, green eyes – definitely a change from Yuugi, who, we all know, she was in love with all throughout High School. His name's like James… John… Ron… Robert… Yeah Robert! That's his name. His name is Robert… Or was it Ralf…?

Ryou isn't sure what he's going to do. He says he's either going back to Britain to see his Father (who's doing some archeologist work or something) or he's going to go with Yuugi to Egypt. Now that was a shock to find out. We all thought that Bakura was some abusive, psychopath… but apparently he and Ryou had something serious going on.

Honda, he's moving to America with Otogi. Apparently, Dice Boy's company is hitting it off well there. Not surprising though, with Kaiba pretty much ruling the gaming world in Japan. Otogi was bragging about Kaiba's lack of attention to his branch in America. So, the green eyed guy figures he can take control and give the brunet a run for his money.

Ah yeah, the Kaiba brothers. I don't make a point to hang out with Mr. Stick-Stuck-Up-My-Ass, but his little brother is a different story. Mokuba's a sweet kid. Last weekend he said he and Kaiba might be going to America as well. But it seems the CEO really is paranoid, and for the first time in history he can't make up his mind; if he should stay and run Kaiba Corporation in Japan, or leave for America to make sure the branch gets back on its feet, and running as smoothly as the others around the world. Mokuba told me he'd rather stay in Japan, but wouldn't say why. I figured it was because it was familiar, but I didn't push the subject.

As for me, well, I'm staying in Japan, taking some classes in Osaka. I love Japan, but it's a scary thought to think of all my friends leaving. I'll be the only one left. I mean, I am leaving soon (Even though Osaka is only a short drive from here, so I guess I'm not _really_ leaving, not like most people).

No one knows I can paint… well draw really. I love to draw. I keep a sketch pad with me almost all the time, and no one knows. It's kind of funny, the thing I'm best at I keep a secret. I guess that's a good thing about all this. I can finally bring it out, and make it an "official" hobby, maybe if I'm lucky a job. Not a real job true, but enough to pay for supplies, and still keep it fun.

…..

Even so, I have no idea what's to come in my life – I know, no one ever does – but I want to be the best person I can be. I want to bring something to the world. Yuugi has saved it countless times, Kaiba brings smiles to peoples faces – well his company does… Kaiba making people smile... now _that's_ a scary thought – when they use his inventions, Honda fixes things for people, Otogi made a game for entertainment, Anzu dances to inspire people, Ryou helps anyone he can…. So, why can't I do something to help?

No matter how many ways I look at the situation, it always leads to this empty feeling in my gut.

In three months I'll be all by myself: no one to call at all hours of the day, no random plans to go to the arcade. It all ends, and I stay behind.

I know I'm not going to lose my friends; we are always going to be here for each other no matter how far away we are… but…

Can I do everything I want to accomplish without them?

… I'm not going to lie… I'm worried…

Scared.

I'm not afraid to be alone. I mean it's scary, but it's more of… life that I'm scared of.

I wonder how I'll fair on my own; will I live life the way I want too? Will I make people laugh and smile? Can I contribute something good to this world, or will I do something stupid and fuck up my own life?

Will I turn into my father?

Life is something you only have one shot at. I was lucky enough to be given a second chance already, thanks to Yuugi. I got out of a gang I was in. To be honest, it isn't something I'm proud of, and it wasn't my idea, but when you've lived where I have, you have to put up with shit, do things you don't want to do… just to survive.

Now, I'm about to start a completely new chapter of things; new challenges, new friendships, new experiences…

I'm not sure if I'll be able to handle things.

But I can only hope, when I am lying on my deathbed, that I am genuinely proud of who I am, and the things I've done in my life.

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Lime Rocker: I was debating on making this a speech during their graduation and having Jou, for some reason, giving it… but I decided it spoke better it end it there. However, I am playing with the idea of a different story with Jou giving a speech for the hell of it.

Please review, and tell me what you think!


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